Your life is doomed to hell, if you do not learn. There are people who never learn but you can't pride yourself thinking about their existence. Your pain is your own. It is your own personal problem and personal property, if you will. It has been true that some spiritual books have ruined my life instead of improving it. Beware of such books that make death so cheap and/or give false hope of things which in reality are not so.
Life is difficult and that is what makes it so dear, so expensive and so worthwhile. There are many times when you cannot find your way to accomplish what you want to and almost always this will bring you thrills as you will apply new ways of thinking and acting cause' that will be your only choice. It's true, you never know how strong you are unless being strong becomes the only option that you have.
You will remain who you are until you dare, you have to venture out of your comfort zone, out of your patterns and habits that have come of age, a long-long time ago. Anyways, coming back to the lessons you have to learn in life, I would suggest that you learn it now because now is the only point of time that you have and if something is worth doing, it is worth doing it now. Rest is upto you, to decide whether taking steps to improve your life is worth doing or not.
Or as always, should you be waiting for the pain to reach a point that you can't take it anymore and allow it to drag you or you will not stop at pain, any amount of pain and continue to procrastinate till the point of extinction (there's only a one 'you') or will you go totally in the reverse / opposite direction and say to yourself that 'this is the way to live,' and ruin the lives of your family members?
The life we have is the decisions we made. Whether, we take it easy and regret or hard and be happy, is our own decision. No one can force it out of him/her. Death is not cheap, it is damn expensive. Even worth more than all the money you have ever seen, for you only live once. It happens once to any individual and then it's all over. Hence, the only opportunity to improve your life is now, the only opportunity to learn.
Take a reference from what you have not done - form your failures and your procrastinations, and do exactly the opposite. Keep on doing it. There's no help in reading self-help books and you are going to gain nothing from it. They are full of blabber and false hope. Life is the only real teacher. The fight in the world is yours. Yours alone, for it's every man for himself. If you win, you are the only one who will gain and if you lose, it's only you to suffer that loss.
In the coming times, you will have to show strength you did not know existed within you. You don't know what is at stake until you come face to face with these challenging times ahead. Mind you, it's a dire warning. It's going to be a hell on earth. You will not want to survive as, dying would be easy. Dying would be heavenly; easier. This is just a hypothesis and not a prophecy. But its occurance has a degree of certainty. It may occur, as the world is facing more and newer risks, with every passing day.
In even case, the times that you will be facing ahead, in your personal life will require phenomenal strength.