Life is finding out what exactly it is that you want and getting it. Finding out what exactly, is the most difficult part. But it has to be done because your most intense feelings are associated completely with 'what exactly you want' and that exact thing exists, whether you agree it or not. You are here for 'something.' You cannot be here on this earth plane, without any reason.
Find out what makes you tick by dedicating your time to thorough research about yourself. If that 'something' be materialistic or spiritual, you should not feel ashamed or guilty about yourself. You are not to pass any judgments or harbour the fear of non-conforming. You should not pity yourself, no matter how big your goal turned out to be. It can always be divided into smaller goals.
Life is compellingly big to play small. It's not enough to write it all on paper. Fearlessness and actions are needed to make it a reality. While it's completely understandable, that you are not to make any rash or risky decisions; it is also completely true that ideally, you should attain what you want.
It's only your most intense feelings that will make you feel truly alive. So, find out what your most intense feelings are associated with. Once you find out, go for it. Don't start weighing the pros and cons in your mind. Rest assured, that you are on the right track.
This is the only way to play life. Otherwise, life plays you. Remember, every problem has a solution. Every problem. No matter how big and complex. No matter how entangled, the situation is. Against all odds, against all complexities; you will continue to do what you can do the best. Don't look around the world, don't search around the world for the ultimate secret.
The ultimate secret is you. It's not an arrogant bashing, it has an intricate design. The fundamental of you being here, is to attain what you want. Your life is only what you want. Your life is not concerned with the world. It becomes concerned only when you become it's (the world) unwitting victim.
Practice complete non-conformity in the face of your true will, your true desire. Your way is the only way. Lastly, all the knowledge, know-how, skills, talent and wisdom that you have acquired over the years, are like pieces of a jigsaw puzzle.
They fit together perfectly into a complete and meaningful whole. Don't ever try to downplay and downgrade yourself by thinking yourself inferior to others. They are not better-off. It's only because of your habit of self-pity that they are so.
Every piece of this jigsaw puzzle, which is 'you,' is a manifestation of intense desire and intense yearning. The themes are different but the basic mood is the same, they (the pieces) push you to express your uniqueness. They are all parts of your underlying unity and will support you at the exact moment.
You must accept your responsibility towards expressing the highest level of creativity. You have a magnificent history. Remember your past. Remember your yearnings. It is very important to complete the whole picture, of that which you think of as 'you,' by not holding anything back due to whatever reason.
At times, you have a tendency to become 'good,' which is only in your mind. But, you are only being a passive and stupid victim. You have created a prison about yourself, from which the only escape is enlightened selfishness. Your every effort must yield return. Returns, in your favour. Be prepared to lose your defunct and harmful self by constantly revising your thoughts and behaviors.
You have immense potential, know it before you die. Do what you can, while you can.